FEATURE: JUST JAMAAL

I have mentioned my friend Jamaal before. We now have the pleasure of having Jamaal, stage name Just Jamaal - ah, such a humble man, as a permanent contributor to the blog. He is a free and intelligent thinker, philosopher, preacher and friend whose perspective I value greatly. Please enjoy his first contribution called Circumstances.

As he notes:

"The poem's focus is on recognizing that we all have backgrounds; history that shapes us, and we are who we are in the present because of external and internal forces that sometimes we have no control over. So when we meet someone; i.e., an AIDS carrier, condemning them because of their illness, is narrow minded given the fact that we could have easily been in that person's position depending on certain experiences."

CIRCUMSTANCES

In an effort to bridge the human divide of life

Not the division of race, colour, creed, likes or dislikes,

But the division of space, the segregation that disallows me to behold each and every gracious human beings face on this spacious planet.

The separation of countless miles and oceans, flat plains and mountains of continental proportions, the division of borders, and especially the division of those orders sent down by mankind to suppress the unity of humankind so that we may no longer share this expansive land and walk through terrestrial gates together, but we now must squeeze through tight corridors and reside in small living quarters secretly hiding our flaws so we may not be judged by common laws.

I decided to utilize an online "social networking" website to reveal a personal revelation;

I signed up to Facebook.

I mean, why else would I create an account for, just so I can spy through the files of individuals when I'm bored?

I use it to creep through the live of individuals silently at night so that I may peep through the eyes of their environments and hopefully pop this bubble that I have placed myself in.

And I don't usually strive to be like the status quo, but I mean, FB has this thing called status box, so, I wrote, and I quote,

"Some people feel I have fallen off the face of the Earth. Some people want me off the face of the Earth and some people don't care less where I am, and that, hurts my soul."

Within two minutes a friend had responded to the post. It read, "That was powerful."

You see from her response I realized that behind all these concrete walls of wires and barriers we still remain a species that can only survive through the understanding of each other's lives.

For human beings lives are as light which shines on everything, with each ray illuminating it's specific designation.

And we all speak, and we all talk and we all walk for a reason.

It's the age old adage that came to my mind, that we must place ourselves in each other's shoes, that you must "do unto others as you would like done unto you."

So, in an effort to eliminate judging, to eliminate discriminating, to initiate dialogue I wrote this monologue.

Have you ever wondered that there are people who may know more about you than yourself?

Mothers, fathers, doctors, teachers, these people witnessed you in your early stages of your health. I mean let's face it, the person you are now has been shaped by the events that took place in your younger life, and people play a great part in that, because it is people that create experiences which become our circumstances, so there are perhaps people walking this Blue World who know more about you than your so called self. It's a scary thought. I wonder who knows my life story, but allow me to share a part of my known history.

As a young child I spent most of my days scared and crying.

Scared and crying and silently dying because of the anger and anguish that I witnessed in my home.

It was enough to lead me into a life of crime and languish.

My father was never home, and my mother was condoned because of her illness. So I spent most of my days alone, even though I had siblings, my brothers and sisters were all bigger than me not only in age but in stature, so I was forgotten.

And as I become older I became colder, because I thought the world had robbed me of my childhood. For too long I had concealed this pain within me.

But as a man who reflected, I detected that I needed to stay connected in order to break down the barriers that we have created, and so no that pain has transformed into a pang of hunger, hunger, a hunger to rejoin what was lost, but is now so close to being found, the mutual love, respect and care for all other creatures that share this living space we call Mother Earth.

So I choose to empathize with each and every person

Because I would rather sympathize with those who don't deserve my sympathy, than despise those who do deserve my hate.

And even as I relate this revelation, this confession to you,

I guess it doesn't matter to you what I've been through, the lives I have created and the lives I have affected and the lives I have rejected. All that seems to matter is how you want me to be, not knowing, that who I am is largely due to what I have lived and experienced. I am....only human....and so....since you are too....WHO are YOU to judge me!

I tell you all this so that perhaps you don't judge me too harshly in my actions and decision, when I pretend to be beautiful and when I behave ugly. Don't pin me to the donkey's body, don't hold me there only because that is where I make sense to you. Don't be so quick to rip the lid off my Pandora's Box!

Because, I know an ex-con man who stabbed a man in order to protect his turf, and he is that for a reason,

I have ate with people that migrated from the west indies who have contracted HIV, and carry other auto immune deficiencies and they are that for a reason,

I visit a mother who cannot afford to care for her 6 plus children living in dilapidated Greater Toronto Area conditions, and she is that for a reason,

I once car pooled a prostitute who didn't have the means to commute to and from her place of work, and she is that for a reason,

I have sate with spiritual scholars, who have left the world of religion behind, to live and struggle in this daily western grind,

I have walked into Tim Horton's and dared to share conversations with the homeless over a cup of peppermint tea and a honey cruller.

So don't crucify me, because my identity differs from your reality.

Remember that human beings lives are a light which shines on everything, with each ray illuminating it's specific designation.

And we all speak, and we all talk, and we all walk for a reason

Because beyond the divisional lines we create in our minds,

Many of us are just poor, tired and sad human beings,

Living,

Under different circumstances.